thoughts

It came to my attention over coffee the other day just how little I have been writing lately, on here or anywhere else, and i miss it. I miss being able to just let the emotions from my heart flow into words on the paper before me. It is an amazing way for me to express my feeling and it takes away so much stress. The ability to write is an amazing gift and to not use it makes me feel like it is going to waste. Writing has always been an amazing hobby even before i was any good at it so I thought I would share some of my older stuff:

Ill tell you a little about each one first
This one was originally about a struggle i was having with myself because i feared showing who i was because of what people might think of me. It also use to end with mortality but i changed it because it is now part of the book i am writing:

Imprisoned

Slender beams of moonlight enter

this darkened chamber as i kneel

always sorrowful, always alone,

frozen here,

waiting.

Tortured forms wrough in panes of glass loom,

as dust dances in the air,

forming an image in my mind,

sparing not my darkens soul

Tears on my face.

I raise my head now kneeling before

my uncaring immortality.

I know this one has already been posted on my blog before but here is some background info for it. I wrote this when i was going through a hard time with my ex. their parents didn't want us seeing each other anymore because of something she told them about me and the distance made it impossible for us to get around there wishes but we really cared about each other:

Stolen Emotion

What have you done?

a fog of betrayal as emotions sleep

once we savored wander

untainted and hand in hand

but our thirst vanished

a sickened vision of memory

tears follow hate, follow pain

love condemned

in a burst of bitterness

I Still Love You!

and this last one is actually the first thing i had written on the novel that i have now finished so im not going to really explain this one:

I closed me eyes and tried to remember and with that thought sensations and feelings came flooding back.

I remembered knives cutting into the flesh on my shoulders and excruciating pain flooding my body.

I remembered being trapped in a pit, being able to see the sky but not reach it and having nowhere to run or hide.

I remembered escaping from the pit into a series of tunnels, hearing the endless screams and scrambling of feet behind me.

I remembered reaching the exit of the tunnel and being free in a wide open space. Fear built up inside of me as my heart pounded against my ribcage.

Where do i go now?

Where do I hide?

I began to run. Shock swept over me like a wave when i saw her. I remember her helping. leading me to a van with a weird symbol on the side. The same symbol I realized now that was on Sky's shirt.

More memories flooded my body taking me away from that thought. I remember climbing into the van and trying to explain.

Then nothing and impenetrable darkness filled with hate and sorrow. A hooded figure from my past always lingering. The hood suddenly began to fade and a mad stood before me. His postures and features were strangely familure, but how did I know him. He reminded me strangely of myself.

There was a difference though. it lingered in the air. Even though it looked like me I knew it wasn't. There was something evil about him. I couldn't be evil, could I?